Faith Doesn't Ask Anything in Return, Does It?

Okay so here we go again, let me rant on my blog again lol, even though no one will read it anyway..

It’s still semester break and I have a project that has deadline in the first week of September, but I don’t have any willpower to finish it. Or maybe after I write this blog.

Opening: I just got accepted to Apple Developer Academy Tangerang cohort 2027 (Very very good news).

Well, It was such a rollercoaster to be in this position. The application process has 3 main stages:

1. Portfolio and CV Submission
2. Online Test
3. Offline Interview (Focus Group Discussion)

I was accepted in the first stage, and not the second stage. I failed the online test and it was pretty sad. Now you may wonder, how I got accepted into ADA if I didn’t pass the online test. Well the story begins here.

When I know I didn’t pass the online test, I felt so sad, like some of my friends passed it, but why I didn’t? I updated my CV, portofolio, and developed THIS WEBSTIE just for ADA, and knowing I failed felt like all of my efforts were nothing.

But It wasn’t so long until I moved on from ADA and arranged my plan B for the next year, cause someone offers me another opportunity.

And then, in a random thursday afternoon, I got an email from no-reply@developeracademy.id, said I had a second chance and to confirm my attendance for the offline interview! I was so happy man, didn’t expect they would offer me a second chance. What a divine intervention!

I prepared for the offline interview, I researched how was the alumni’s or current learners’ FGD experiences. Their experiences were different across years and regions, and my experience was different from them even though it was the same region. But that’s okay, it gave me a big picture how it was going to be and it was pretty helpful.

I arrived at BSD very early just incase I got lost in the area or stuck in a traffic jam. Turned out everything (including the traffic) was okay, I met new people there, and they were very friendly, we had time for a short chit-chat before the FGD, and so on.

After the interview, I explored the GOP 9 area before I went home, went to a cafe with my friend and did some coding there. The area was really cozy and peaceful, It made me hope to be accepted there..

The interview was held in 12 August, and the acceptance announcement itself is on 14 August, the gap is pretty close. But skip to the announcement day…

ba dum tss 🥁

I got accepted, letsgooo!

That’s the story from me.

Back to the topic.

Have you ever like your prayer doesn’t get answered even though you feel lke praying “hard” enough. Yep, that was me a year before. I was overdemanding without exactly understood how faith really worked back then. After I contemplate, I think that is the fact: I only asked or prayed hard enough, or practiced to be a good Catholic if I have a wish. And the problem was: I only asked for worldly gift, nothing related to be more faithful or salvation.

“But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”
- Matthew 6:33

Everything changed when I asked to be more faithful and always be avoided from temptation. Then, I started to view it from a different perspective. Rather than chasing frivolously worldly gift, I’m so grateful for everything that God has given or taken from me, because everything leads to salvation of my soul. I don’t complain no more even though things don’t turn out like how I planned it.

I spent (not very a lot of time) in the adoration room for the last few weeks. I was praying in the adoration room, an hour before I got an email from ADA about my second chance. I didn’t ask/complaining anything about ADA back then, just prayed and spent an hour with God. God really works in a mysterious way.

Same thing happened, a day before the acceptance announcement. It is thursday and I couldn’t wait for the result. So instead of just overthinking, I went to the adoration room and recited the same prayer for over 77x times: Our Father. The experience changed how you understood prayer.

It’s just an example, I was going through the impossible because I changed the purpose of my faith and prayer, also started to spend more time with God (btw don’t forget to ask for our Mother of God’s intercession).

In the end, you can ask, hope, or pray for something but it is not a transaction.